Giving birth

and the head is cresting. or something like that. not so clued up on the birthing process, but i will have you know that in my childless world, this is the closest i’ve come to imagining what a birth experience is like.

and my god the sturm und drang. i like to console myself with the fact that this was all a much more heightened emotional exercise due to the non-fiction nature of the book bebe. like, there’s no ‘oh well, people didn’t take to the STORY so i’ll just do another STORY next time’. it’s much more like standing up in front of class when you’re 14 and doing a mondeling* about your weird family and strange hygiene habits.

god, sometimes i really wish i could just slice out the part of my brain that makes everything poo when i’m stressed.

cos technically this should be a very exciting time. and i am excited. so excited. excited like this:


hahahaha that did put a big ol smile on my face. hahahahahaha.


now there’s the whole ‘tell everyone around the world about it’ bit and ‘the launch’ bit. am thinking of doing some talky talks around the country maybe. maybe do a global tour. maybe land a slot on oprah’s show that she’ll bring out of retirement so i can feature on oprah’s book club.

haha a girl can dream right?

maybe i’ll just go have a snooze somewhere and pretend this is all a lovely, unchallenging dream.

you know. i’ve wanted to ‘write a book’ since i could think in straight sentences. i’ve wanted to write TV/movie/play stuff since the first script i wrote and directed when i was 12. i wanted wanted wanted all these things… now i’ve got them.

now what?


hahahaha. so much laffing with that lemon. god. you know i mostly blog to amuse myself? anyway.

i am super stoked about all the new experiences and all the next new experiences that will come. but this part right here, this ‘now what’ part, just after you get what you wanted, and just before you get used to it? well. i still need to make friends with it.

it does make me think of the blog post about a blog post about what pain you’re willing to go through to get what you want. check it out > The most important question you could ask yourself (tappity tap or clickety click)

now to search for some new NSFW for this week’s feature…

*afrikaans word for ‘oral’ but not in the sex kind, the kind where you stood up and did a presentation for a group of your peers who’s brains aren’t yet developed for empathy.