Writing about writing, Kinkly Top 2015 and Postsecret…

So i know that this is possibly the most ridiculous time of year to kick off the blogging again, but a girl’s gotta start somewhere right? I thought I’d give you a little quick ‘catch-up’ of the last week or so. writing about writing I wrote a short columny thing for brightrock about writing a […]

Do you have sex with the lights on?

If you’ve never had a problem with your body and how other people see it, this column is not for you. For the rest, Dorothy Black turns the spotlight on body confidence in the bedroom. Lover and I did a strange and unexpected thing the other night. Something completely unusual and a little bit kinky. […]

Don’t share your passwords with your partner

Does signing up for a relationship mean handing over your passwords? Dorothy Black believes personal privacy and trust need to work together. I heard a story the other day about a woman who was advised by a sex therapist to exchange phones with her husband. The therapist believed the woman’s husband was cheating on her. […]

Ghosting: the worst way to break up?

While simply ceasing all contact may not be the best way to end a relationship, Dorothy Black feels it’s better to be a ghost than chase one. Finally, I have something in common with Onse Charlize other than being born in the same country. We’re both ghosters. I’m not proud of this fact, but I […]

Are you the side chick?

Does your boyfriend always have an excuse for why you can’t make plans or meet the family? Can he never take your calls or sleep over? Dorothy Black suspects you might be the side chick… We were sitting in studio discussing the pros and cons of tech in relationships when a call came from a […]

Introducing your great, big (internal) clit and tiny skenes glands

updated from the 2011/2012 post With 8 000 nerve endings and almost as much erectile tissue as a penis, Dorothy Black discovers the true wonders of the internal clitoris I only found out about my clit a few years ago. Well. The whole of it at least. The whole other part that is attached to […]

About dead bedrooms: Is a sexless partnership about mismatched libidos?

Is there such a thing as ‘high libido’ and ‘low libido’? Dorothy Black looks into sexual response and the phenomenon of ‘dead bedrooms’ I was once asked to answer the question: Can a marriage survive without sex? My answer was simple. Of course it can. It can also survive without love, trust and honesty. But […]

10 things you should stop doing in bed

Not sure what you’re doing wrong in the sack? Dorothy Black would like to tell you… Sometimes the only people who can tell you what’s what when it comes to your love life are your friends. They’ve got perspective on your character, know all your emo soft spots, and can spot the crazy little things […]

Is it time to rethink the Kinsey scale?

Dorothy Black spoke to gender activist and psychosexual educator Delene van Dyk about love, sex and the evolution of our sexual orientation. I’ll ask you a question that was put forward to me the other day: ‘What do you understand by “sexual orientation”?’ If you’re anything like me – and most other people – you […]

Keep your sext life safe

Scared of finding your booty online thanks to an angry ex? You don’t have to diss digital sex play completely, you just need to be smarter, says Dorothy Black Until recently I didn’t have a password on my phone. This is silly for a number of reasons, but since my phone is old and unstealworthy, […]